Great start so far. Just don't forget to put a description in! lol
I really liked the flow and detail. But there are just a few (minor) suggestions (you don't have to listen to them)...
"With the jewel gone, and everyone became busy with the task of recovering from the aftermath of the battle"
I think you should remove "and" becuase it doesn't make sense.
"In another 4 months time, there would be a celebration across the lands."
If a number is less than (I believe) 100 then it should be typed out. I know you typed out the others but this one caught my eye while reading it.
"Look AKEMi"
I think you missed the i. That's it lol
Also, maybe you could explain a little about why Kirara stayed with Kagome and Inuyasha instead of going with Sango.
"They stopped laughing when Sesshouaru shot them the ame look. "
I believe you meant "same".
"Oni-san, what brings you over to see us?"
I believe you meant "Onii"
I also don't really get/understand this exchange of sentences:
"Oni-san, what brings you over to see us?"
Sesshoumaru shot her a dirty look.
"You will desist from referring to this Sesshoumaru in that way."
"Why?" Kagome asked,still smiling, completely unaware.
Shippou choked on his fish from laughter and started to cough
*At first I thought that he gave her the dirty look because he's inuyasha's half brother, not full brother. But then she asks why still being completely unaware, when she knows the tension between the brother/halfbrother issue. Also, why did shippou and rin find it so funny?
and last but not least:
I think you should save the last sentence for the next chapter, if you are able. Because before that it is a great ending and good for transition and leaves you wondering just a bit about what they are going to find. but with the last sentence tacked on it seemes like you just gave away the punch line of you joke before you even finished telling it (figuratively).
Anyways, if you actually made it down to the bottom of the god-forsakenly long review then I congradulate you. And I look forward to reading the following chapters.
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