Page 3 of 3
<< Start < Prev 1 2 3 Next > End >>
cassandra (Chapter 7) - Thu 28 Feb 2013

What an ass!


Sesshomaru's Night (Chapter 6) - Wed 27 Feb 2013

..... Wow..... Mind blown :) more please T.T


LoveAndFaith (Chapter 6) - Wed 27 Feb 2013

Keep it coming.


tonya (Chapter 6) - Wed 27 Feb 2013

keep up the good work


cassandra (Chapter 4) - Tue 26 Feb 2013

I sure hope they get there in time!


LoveAndFaith (Chapter 4) - Tue 26 Feb 2013

Keep it coming.


Sesshomaru's Night (Chapter 4) - Tue 26 Feb 2013

Oh my gosh..... More!!!!! T.T


cassandra (Chapter 3) - Mon 25 Feb 2013

I got a feeling that Inuyasha has an ass beating coming from Sesshomaru for what he did. But then again Sesshomaru always beats on him.


Sesshomaru's Night (Chapter 3) - Mon 25 Feb 2013

And the plot thickens..... More!!!


Samara (Chapter 3) - Mon 25 Feb 2013

I belive you are doing very well for your first sess/kag fic... this plot has captured my interest...

Update soon!!


LoveAndFaith (Chapter 3) - Mon 25 Feb 2013

Poor Kagome I hope they find her, keep it coming.


Phyllis (Chapter 1) - Sun 24 Feb 2013

Sounds like an interesting start.  A number of grammatical/spelling errors that kind of made it hard to follow.  Other than that, a promising start.  Can't wait to see where you go with this.


Sesshomaru's Night (Chapter 2) - Sun 24 Feb 2013

Shaking my head... Poor Kagome.... Stupid stupid stupid inuyasha .... More!!!


cassandra (Chapter 2) - Sat 23 Feb 2013

Inuyasha is such a total ass! I hope Sesshomaru gives him a beating next! And I feel so bad for Kagome. I hope they save her on time!


LoveAndFaith (Chapter 2) - Sat 23 Feb 2013

Keep it coming.


Lumi (Chapter 1) - Sat 23 Feb 2013

You've got a few spelling errors such as "annouyance" should be annoyance and "grate" should be great, as well as some basic grammatical issues. Also, just as a general story-telling note, whenever a new character speaks, it should be in a new paragraph.
So: "Sesshomaru woke with a start. That damed miko was in his head...AGAIN. Growling in annouyance Lord Sesshomaru got up and walked to his window and looked over the moonlit gardens. "JAKEN" a small toad deamon ran into he room as fast as his little legs could carry him. "y-y-yes m-my l-l-lord?" he stammered, Jaken knew if his Lord bellowed like that he was in a mood that could kill."

Should be:
"Sesshomaru woke with a start. That damed miko was in his head...AGAIN. Growling in annouyance Lord Sesshomaru got up and walked to his window and looked over the moonlit gardens. "JAKEN"
a small toad deamon ran into he room as fast as his little legs could carry him. "y-y-yes m-my l-l-lord?" he stammered, Jaken knew if his Lord bellowed like that he was in a mood that could kill."

Other than that, and a few pacing issues, it seems like an interesting hook. I think, if you fix the style issues and flesh out the story a bit more, so it feels less rushed, this could be quite good!


LoveAndFaith (Chapter 1) - Sat 23 Feb 2013

This story sounds interesting, keep it coming.


Sesshomaru's Night (Chapter 1) - Sat 23 Feb 2013

This is good now I need a part 2!!! 


Page 3 of 3
<< Start < Prev 1 2 3 Next > End >>

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
No money is being made from the creation or viewing of content on this site, which is strictly for personal, non-commercial use, in accordance with the copyright.