Sorry by kaoruhana

Sorry

               This trinket represents our love, she realized, fingering the small bauble at the end of her necklace.  When had he bought it?  Three, four years ago perhaps?  He told her he’d found it touring the Tanzanian countryside on a business trip with an oil tycoon there.  It reminded him of her and he had presented it to her.  A month later he proposed.  And now she’d let him walk out of her life forever. 

                She knew she was a wreck but he put up with it and he was the best thing that happened to her instable life.  She loved him, was willing to spend the rest of her life with him, and now she’d just let him go.  They weren’t perfect but they’d managed for seven years by managing as a pair.  What one lacked was made up for in the other.  And now that he was gone, she felt so empty- as though that other half of her had vanished. 

                What had caused this again?  They were fighting over- over her job.  She knew that they’d both agreed to let her stop working if she ever got pregnant.  And now that she thought about it- he’d never told her to quit.  He’d merely begged her to take care of herself for a while.  She was there for another being.  And then she’d told him she wished she wasn’t pregnant. 

                Kagome keeled over in sobs and gingerly touched the small bump under her hands.  She’d never ever say that again.  She knew how much Sesshomaru was looking forward to this moment and she’d just gone and ruined it all hadn’t she?  She wished so hard that the past few hours could be redone, that she’d never gotten into an argument with her husband, and that he hadn’t left for god knows where.

                The door rattled and she turned hoping that it was her husband.  Instead she saw brother walk in.  He noticed her and immediately rushed over. 

                “Kagome?  What’s wrong?  Where’s Sesshomaru?”  Souta drew her into a hug.  He’d only once seen Kagome like this and that was after her first fight with Sesshomaru.  Knowing that words wouldn’t help at the moment he gently held her and shushed her. 

                “There there.  You want to talk about it?” 

                Kagome froze up for a moment before she fell down into her resigned position again.  No, she didn’t want to talk about it.  She wanted to go find her husband and tell him how sorry she was.  How she loved him and wanted him back. 

                The door jingled again and keys were pushed into an already open door.  Slowly the door creaked open and a head of silver hair appeared.  He looked at the sight in the living room.  Kagome hadn’t moved from her position and she was hugging her brother but her eyes sought his.  Souta sensing the sudden tension in the room let go of his sister and walked out of the apartment.  Kagome would tell him more tomorrow after all. 

                Sesshomaru slowly walked over and collapsed on the floor next to her.  He reached out with an arm and slung it around her shoulders drawing her closer to him without saying a word.  He was tired of fighting- something they’d been doing the past few months.  When Kagome told him she was pregnant, the fighting had dulled a little.  He knew that whatever was said today wasn’t the truth but the hurt was still there.  And he quickly realized that he had been at fault too for approaching her the way that he had. 

                “I’m sorry.”  It was hard to hear but he heard the apology there.  “Please don’t ever leave again.”  The shock the words sent through him had him feel utterly remorseful.  He knew they needed space for a while but he didn’t bother to think that Kagome might be afraid and alone if he’d left. 

                “I’m sorry too.”  He choked out the apology and pulled her into his lap burying his head into her shoulder and inhaling her sweet lilac scent.  They sat that way for a while until she spoke again. 

                “I really do want this baby.  I’ll never ever say that again.”  He placed a hand on her stomach and pulled away from Kagome. 

                “I know.”  He let his words sink in when she met him eye for eye.  That was when he noticed the bauble clutched tightly in her hands.  “Why do you have this?”  He remembered that it was a gift he’d given her but he rarely ever saw her wear the necklace.  She liked to keep it safe, sitting on her nightstand. 

                “When you left, I just needed something.”  Words couldn’t be erased, actions either, but sometimes understanding was all it took to hold something together when it teetered on the brink of collapsing. 

                “I love you too Kagome.”