In These Moments by Quiet Whisper

The Story of Our Lives

A/N: This is a oneshot plunnie that attacked me and wouldn't let go until I wrote it. I warn you now it's a tear jerker- I pretty much cried through the whole thing while writing it. But there are happy moments to ease it a bit. (Regular text for the first half is present tense, italics are for past tense- when you get to the ~*~ it's all present tense, BOLD is for the song lyrics I added... there's just a few from a very moving song titled Into The Light by In This Moment ~you should really check it out, I had it on repeat for the whole thing and it made it that much more moving for me~ As always I welcome reviews so don't be shy, just please no flames. This isn't a start to finish story, and you've been warned that it's sad.

Disclaimer: I only own the plunnie and the muse that made me do this.

And so it begins...

They’d been through many things throughout their lives; the first and foremost had been gaining his acceptance, and at first they believed that to be the worst of the trials they would face…

“Inuyasha?” She asked hesitantly as she graced her best friend with an anxious expression.

For his part, Inuyasha had seemingly taken a page from his brother’s book and had remained void of all emotion as he listened to the two standing in front of him.

“Inuyasha please… please say something.” She begged even as her companion rested a hand on her shoulder to prevent her from closing the distance between them.

Slowly Inuyasha blinked as he shifted his gaze to her face; the face that reminded him so much of his once great love, and to this day continued to do so. But she wasn’t Kikyou; at least, she wasn’t in this life.

He supposed he should be angry with her for this; angry that she was now going against the promise she’d made to him so long ago, the promise that bound her to his side. In the end though, he found that if there was anyone he should be angry with, it was himself.

He knew he ran the risk of pushing her away with his harsh words and cold attitude; he’d warned himself of that possibility many times, but he’d never listened.

And now it was too late; he could feel the distance between them growing even larger as he watched the hope for his approval slowly fade from her too bright eyes. There is still time… you can still be a part of her life. A voice whispered in the recesses of his mind.

“Come Kagome.” Her companion murmured; believing that they had wasted their time in this endeavor.

It would take a blind man to miss the way her eyes filled with tears; it would take a man of less stature than him to miss the scent of those unshed tears, even as she lowered her head and turned away to hide them from him.

But then something happened; for the first time since he’d met the feisty little Miko, he realized that there was something he could finally do to make her happy. Once all he had to do was give himself to her in the way that she had given herself to him; but now it was too late for that, and he knew if he didn’t give her his blessing now, then she would feel guilty for the rest of her life. And she didn’t deserve that.

She’d barely turned away when a hand snaked out to grab her wrist; she froze only a moment before turning back slowly while lifting her head to gaze at him with sorrow, yet hope filled eyes.

And just like that he closed the growing distance to wrap his arms around her. “Okay.” He whispered into her hair even as she brought her arms up to embrace him.

“Okay?” She asked hesitantly.

“Okay.” He said with finality even while he glanced up at the one person he never expected to fall for her.

Sesshomaru straightened and locked gazes with him; no words were spoken, but that didn’t stop them from having a silent conversation.

‘If you hurt her I’ll hunt you to the ends of the earth.’ Inuyasha’s eyes said.

Sesshomaru simply inclined his head in acknowledgement.

But as time passed and more trials arose; they came to realize that gaining Inuyasha’s approval for their union was to be the least of their worries…

“The enemy forces are closing in, we cannot hope to defeat them.” The haggard looking messenger reported. 

Kagome worried the sleeves of her kimono as she turned to gaze up at her mate to find his face once more held no emotion. After they’d been mated, they had been granted a time of peace, and had enjoyed it immensely.

But there was no changing history, and the time for the humans to rise up in hopes of ridding the world of youkai had come once more. If it had happened a few decades ago they may have stood a chance; with the aid of her friends, who’d already fought and succeeded in defeating the greatest evil known to the world, they may have won.

But Sango, Miroku, Rin, and Kohaku’s time on this earth had come and gone. Out of all of them, Kagome had been the only one granted immunity to the passage of time, thanks to being taken as Sesshomaru’s mate.

It was times like these that she missed them the most; for when they were with her, she felt as if anything was possible. Now only a few of the original group remained but…

They had lost contact with Shippo and Kirara after they’d gone to the East to check up on Koga and his pack; the kit having reached full maturity only a decade ago, wanted to help in any way that he could. Kagome didn’t want her adopted son fighting, even though he’d mastered his fox magic, and so they charged him with the task of running errands with the aid of Sango’s dearest friend.

Jaken, while irritating as ever, was still present. But he’d always been useless for a fight and was instead charged with seeing to it that the shiro didn’t fall apart in these trying times.

And as for Inuyasha… he’d disappeared shortly after Kagome and Sesshomaru had been mated, and to this day they still had no way of knowing whether he was dead or alive…

“What do you wish of us My Lord?” His general asked.

Sesshomaru blinked then looked down at him. “Secure the hidden passage; get as many of the shiro’s occupants to safety as you can, my mate and I will provide a distraction and once we retreat, we will meet up with you.”

Kagome’s hand flew to cover her mouth even as the General bit back his argument while bowing at the waist. They both knew that once Sesshomaru had made up his mind, there was no changing it. All they could hope to do now was see to it that as many youkai survived this unnecessary bloodshed until a compromise could be reached.

As soon as his orders had been issued, the shiro was alive with activity as its occupants ran to hastily pack anything they could before being ushered to the underground passage that would lead them to safety.

Within the hour the shiro was deserted save for the two that had presided over it for the last hundred years. Kagome watched as the last of the servants vanished into the tunnel before shifting her gaze to watch as Sesshomaru headed over to the mighty statue that guarded the passage. The statue was that of his great father in his truest form.

“Step back.” He murmured to her; and even then she knew his heart was breaking.

But now was not the time for words of comfort, so she did as told. It didn’t stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks as she watched Sesshomaru destroy the statue until nothing of the hidden passage remained.

“Come, it is time for us to do our part.” He said as he joined her then grasped her arm and tugged her along, never once looking back.

The army of humans had reached the wall by this time and they were wasting no time in their attempts to beat down the gate. Their battle cries and shouts of victory echoed across the land, it was both deafening and heartbreaking.

The noise soon died out though as the ground began to shake; the humans glanced around in confusion as parts of the damaged wall began to fall, and all chaos broke out as they scrambled to get away from the rain of debris.

But the rain of debris was nothing compared to what happened next; there was no warning before a part of the shiro exploded outward as the great white inu shot out like a streak of light. The humans cried out and begged the gods for their mercy as the great beast leapt over the wall; his acidic saliva spewing from his mouth, melting whatever it came into contact with.

But even with taking out so many with his poison; there were simply too many for him to take on by himself, and a glance out of the corner of his eye reminded him that he also had another reason for escaping intact.

Shiro’s could be rebuilt; wars fought and won or lost depending on the god’s leniency, but not everything was replaceable. There would only ever be one woman that could claim his heart; and as he watched her cling onto his back as he tore through the forces that threatened to tear them apart, he decided that nothing was more important than her survival.

It was the first of many battles fought; and only after years of hard work and strife, did a solution present itself. It was thanks to Kagome that the war had been ended, and at long last peace was made.

But it did little good; too many youkai had lost their lives, and they soon became known as an endangered species. And as the years passed, only the strongest found the means to survive through the times.

They managed to reconnect with Shippo and Kirara after the war had ended; he’d succeeded in reaching the ookami’s den, and had ended up staying there to help fend off any and all who wished to add them to the pages of history. He was never the same after that; and only after years of solitude did he find his absolution, in the arms of a kitsune female… perhaps one of the last.

Kirara remained by his side until the end of her days; her death heralding the end of the Neko youkai race, as she was the last of her kind.

And there was still no sign of Inuyasha; so after many more years, they held a small ceremony to say goodbye.

One struggle after another; the two forged a path through time, side by side. When one faltered; the other was there to pick up the slack, a true partnership in every sense of the word. It was the only thing to keep them going through the truly painful moments of life.

But even then a time must come when both suffer; and it is in those times there is true fear, for what if they fall so far that they don’t know how to get back up…

“And how is my mate today?” Sesshomaru asked as he approached her from behind to wrap his arms around her already protruding belly.

“Tired,” She sighed as she rested her hands over his. “The pup has been restless all day.”

“Let me see.” He said as he turned her around then knelt to press his ear against her stomach.

She smiled softly as she rested her hands on his shoulders; waiting patiently as he listened to the movements of the unborn pup in a way that she couldn’t.

“His aura is strong.” He said as he pulled away to look up at her. “And his movements are sound. There is nothing to be afraid of.”

“I believe you.” She said earnestly then chewed on her bottom lip; a habit she’d never been able to break herself of, and it signaled that she was still worried. “But a lot of things can happen.”

“Trust in me.” He said as he climbed to his feet and pulled her into his embrace. “Everything is fine, he is just restless.”

“Okay.” She murmured as she closed her eyes and buried her face into his shoulder. No longer did he wear his signature clothing, and his pelt was lying in a pile upon their bed, it was his last connection to a time that no longer existed.

The fear never left her though; and when she awoke in the middle of the night, her stomach cramping horrendously, she came to discover that her long awakened maternal instincts had been warning her that something was wrong.

She woke Sesshomaru in a panic and he wasted no time in scooping her into his arms before taking off for the nearest hospital. But they were still a good one hundred and fifty years from her time, and medical knowledge was still new.

There was nothing they could do to stop her from going into labor; and when the pup came into the world, it was with his cord wrapped around his neck. They managed to get it unwrapped and got him breathing; but he was three months early and too small to survive in such a big world.

Kagome sobbed brokenly as she cradled him in her arms; and even after he had given up with a soft sigh, she continued to rock him. Sesshomaru felt as if his heart was being ripped to shreds even as he tried to hold his mate in hopes of comforting her.

The laughter and joy left her eyes; and he once again retreated behind the stoic mask he’d shed long ago. Darkness crept in every corner of their house as motes of dust danced wherever a curtain had parted enough to let a sliver of light through, almost as if it was trying to push the dark away.

It wasn’t until one day that Sesshomaru awoke to find himself face to face with his mate that he realized something had to change. It was the first day in over a year that he’d actually woken up facing her; and even in the dark he could make out every feature of her face, remembered everything about her that had made him fall in love with her to begin with.

Usually he got up and readied for the day, only to sit around and do nothing aside from listen to the static that substituted as noise in their home. But not this day; no today things were going to change, and they were going to change for the better.

He watched as her breathing picked up and a moment later she blinked her eyes open. If she was surprised to see him still in bed and facing her no less, she didn’t show it and instead simply held her position.

Nothing was said as they studied the features of each other’s faces; not a word was spoken as they both slowly remembered what it had been like to be happy, to know that no matter what happened they would always have each other.

“Good morning.” She finally murmured.

“Good morning.” He replied.

It was nothing grand, but it was a start.

And time continues on; it wasn’t always easy but then it never had been. Children of fate rarely had a happy life; simply because they’d been created to endure one hardship or another so the rest of the world could continue to exist.

“Damnit Sesshomaru this is serious!” She exclaimed as she glared at him. “This war is not going to be pretty and Japan is going to suffer more than most countries simply because our government is foolish enough to think they can take on America.”

“What would you have me do?” He growled as he clenched his fists at his side. “This is a part of the treaty and the time has come to honor my end.”

“There is no honor in this!” She screamed before collapsing to the floor as her tears finally broke free to rain down her cheeks. “What if you die? This isn’t like Sengoku Jidai; things aren’t that simple anymore, battles aren’t fought with swords. You don’t know how to wield a gun, and even you are prone to being torn apart by an atom bomb.”

“I will not die.” He murmured as he knelt before her then gathered her to his chest.

“How can you be so sure?” She whispered as she clung to him.

“Because I once vowed that death would never tear me from your side.” He said into her hair as he ran a hand down her back.

She could do nothing but sob harder as she clung to him with everything she had; praying to the Kami that they would grant them favor this once, for if he did die, she wouldn’t be able to go on.

He left the next day.

Weeks went by without so much as a sign that he was still alive, save for the fact she still bore his mark. She prayed like she had never prayed before each night before she fell into their bed; it was the worst time of day for her, because there were no longer distractions, nothing to pull her attention away from the empty side of the bed where he had slept for centuries.

During the day it wasn’t so hard since she had things to keep herself occupied. Like many women, she took up a job to keep the faltering economy going, but mostly it was to keep herself from giving up hope of him never returning.

She felt her heart sink every time someone from the government would come to where she worked; her eyes always locked on the small pink slip of paper, and she feared the day when one would be brought to her.

But the pink slip never came; and soon the war had ended, but he had yet to return. It was then she started demanding answers as to where he was; but there were so many women like her who had no knowledge of their husbands or sons whereabouts, so information was scarce.

Finally one day, two months after the war had ended, she finally allowed herself to give into despair. Sobbing brokenly, she collapsed to the floor while burying her face in her hands. She lost track of how long she cried her frustration and fears out, and it wasn’t until she felt the familiar yet foreign brush of youki against her senses that she snapped out of it.

Quick as lightning she was on her feet and running through the house; skidding to a halt only long enough to wrench the door open before darting out, and that was when she had the shock of her life.

For not only was Sesshomaru there but so was Inuyasha. She sobbed and laughed at the same time as she darted down the stairs even as Sesshomaru darted forward to sweep her into his arms.

“You’re late.” She chided as she hugged him with everything she had.

“Apologies,” He murmured as he once more took in her scent, the scent he’d been missing for so long. “And I hope you don’t mind, but I picked up a stray, he has nowhere to go for the moment.”

Kagome couldn’t help but laugh as Inuyasha snorted and muttered something unintelligible under his breath. After a quick study of Sesshomaru’s features to make sure he was okay she turned to Inuyasha and grinned.

“You’re really late.”She chided as she scowled at him. “And you have some serious explaining to do.”

“How did I know you were going to say that?” The hanyou sighed and shook his head.

“Oh Inuyasha,” She murmured as she slipped out of her mates grasp to give him a hug. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“Keh,” He snorted even as he hugged her close and rested his cheek on the top of her head. “I missed you to wench.”

That night they told her everything that had happened in the war and why Inuyasha had been absent for so long.

“So I started helping out the other youkai.” He said before wiping his mouth off and leaning back in his chair.

“Why didn’t you keep in contact?” She asked curiously.

“There was a lot going on back then.” He shrugged as he dropped his gaze to the table. “I had a lot of shit in my head that I needed to figure out. Find answers to questions that wouldn’t leave me alone.”

“Silly Inuyasha,” She chided as she reached across the table to squeeze his hand. “Did you find them? Did you figure it out?”

“Some of it,” He shrugged again then smiled faintly as he looked up at her. “And as for the rest… well I’ve got time I can figure it out later.”

“How did you two end up running into each other?” She asked as she looked from one to the other, and when they sobered she gave them both a hard look before growling. “Start talking.”

“He saved my life.” Sesshomaru murmured.

“Keh cocky ass bastard actually thought he could take on a tank.” Inuyasha snorted. “He’s just lucky I was there to watch his back until he finished melting it.”

Kagome gaped at her mate for several moments before she finally blinked and narrowed her eyes at him. “You are in big trouble mister.”

“Of that I have no doubt.” He sighed.

“Ah don’t be too hard on him; he didn’t do anything as stupid after that.” Inuyasha chuckled.

“Thank you Inuyasha.” She said as she offered him a tight smile.

He studied her a moment before nodding once. And that was that.

Time seemed to slow down after that; giving the three of them some time to breath and decide where they would go next, and if they would go together.

But in the end Inuyasha had the wandering spirit, and he soon left for countries unknown- after receiving a lecture from Kagome on where not to go and when not to go there. This time he kept in contact though, even going so far as to send them trinkets and pictures from the various places he travelled.

It was at this time that they tried to give fate another try…

“How are you feeling?” He asked as he cuddled up next to her on their bed.

“I’m alright.” She smiled down at him then grimaced. “I’d be even better if she wouldn’t be sitting on my bladder however.”

Sesshomaru chuckled as he lightly rested a hand on her stomach to revel in the feel of his daughter’s movements. He could hardly believe that they were only a month away from becoming parents; and not for the first time, he wondered if he would make a good father.

He had no doubts as to whether or not Kagome would make a good mother; she’d always possessed a maternal instinct to her, but he on the other hand… The only experience he had to go on was limited since his father had always been too busy ensuring his land and title were safe to spend much time with him.

And when the great Inu no Taisho was around, it was only long enough to train his son in matters of state before leaving the rest to his tutors.

Kagome glanced down at him as he let out a sigh; she smiled as she picked up his mood as easily as she read the book in her lap, but instead of reassuring him right away she asked him. “What are you thinking right now?” She knew it would do him some good to voice it before she said anything else.

“I was thinking of the past.” He murmured as he scooted closer to her so he could rest his head on her shoulder.

“What part?” She asked as she set her book aside so she could wrap her arms around him.

“What things were like when I was a child,” He said after a moment. “I do not remember most of it, a feat I never thought possible.”

“Yes well the memory is usually the first thing to go when one gets old.” She said teasingly then laughed outright when he nipped her on the shoulder. “I’m sorry, I’ll behave myself.”

“See that you do.” He sniffed before sighing. “My father was hardly ever around since he had many matters to tend to. But when he was, he spent no more time with me than was necessary.”

“So who taught you?” She asked; she had to admit she was curious since this was a subject that had never really been broached. Sesshomaru did not like to bring up aspects of his life before he’d met her.

“I had many tutors.” He said. “They were the ones to teach me the ways of the world.”

“I see.” She said as she started running her fingers through his hair. “And does any of this have to do with our current situation?”

“Do you think I will be a good father?” He asked after several moments of silence.

She cocked her head to the side to study the top of his head, and when he finally shifted to look up at her, she smiled. “Sesshomaru I think you’re going to make a wonderful father.”

“Are you certain?” He asked doubtfully.

“Oh silly mate of mine, I wouldn’t say it if it wasn’t true.” She said as she tweaked his nose. “You’ve never failed at anything, you don’t know how to. So trust me when I say you are going to be the best father a girl could have.”

“I have no experience in this endeavor.” He frowned.

She couldn’t help but sigh until she shifted until they were nose to nose. “Yes you do.”

He blinked in surprise before his eyes took off a faraway look. “Rin.”

“Exactly,” She murmured. “And while you may not have been her real father, you were the only father she knew. You took care of her, saw to it she was clothed, fed, had a roof over her head, and taught her many valuable lessons. And while you may not have been able to express it at the time, you loved her. And she knew that.”

She waited as he pondered her words a moment, and when she saw the shift of emotions in his brilliant amber eyes she knew he’d taken her words to heart. “Okay.”

“Good, now would you mind helping me up? I need to use the bathroom.” She said then grinned impishly when he huffed.

He helped her of course, but even as things went back to normal, he would spend many nights thinking back on their conversation while she slept.

And a month and three days after he wondered if he was going to be a father, the time had come for him to stop wondering and instead, do.

“Alright Kagome it’s almost time.” The doctor said as he felt her stomach.

“It’s about damn time.” She growled as she gripped onto her mates hand with everything she had.

She’d been in labor for sixteen hours already and was more than ready to give birth; Sesshomaru had remained by her side throughout the whole thing, even though it had wreaked havoc on the instincts that told him he needed to end his mates suffering.

“I swear to Kami if you ever touch me again, I’ll purify you!” She screamed at him for what seemed the millionth time as another contraction hit.

“The head is crowning.” A nurse said then moved so the doctor could take a look.

“Alright Kagome, it’s time. When you feel the next contraction I want you to push.” He said as he motioned for one of the nurses to take one of her legs while Sesshomaru did the same with the other.

“Breathe Kagome.” Sesshomaru ordered as he held her leg with one hand while she continued to grip his other.

She simply shot him a dirty look before grunting as she hunched down; it was hard not to scream, but she didn’t want Sesshomaru going deaf just yet. And besides, she was so tired and just wanted it to be done.

“And the heads out.” The doctor said; diverting Sesshomaru’s attention from his mate.

For a moment he forgot to breathe as he stared down at the oddly shaped and colored head that the doctor told him was their daughter. It looks nothing like a pup. He thought distantly before being yanked back to reality as Kagome screamed through clenched teeth as her body was wracked with another contraction.

Before long it was all over and the moment Kagome heard her daughter cry out for the first time, she sagged back in relief. “Oh thank you Kami.” She mumbled even as the doctor placed the pup on her stomach so she could imprint as Sesshomaru cut the cord.

She tried to lift her head to watch as the nurse picked her baby up and carried her off to get her cleaned up, but she had no strength. And even as she rested her head back on the bed and the room fell silent, she knew something was wrong.

The voices around her began to fade even as they picked up in their volume and for a moment she thought she saw Sesshomaru’s eyes flash red. And then just like that, the world faded into nothingness…

Life takes many twists and turns, and some things can’t be changed. But fortunately for him this was something he could fix. There was only this one chance, but it was worth it…

All at once the world came crashing back, and she bolted upright while gasping for air while her eyes darted around the room. In no time at all they were coming to rest on her mate, and she watched in shock and understanding as he sheathed the blade that he had insisted on bringing with them.

“Extraordinary.” The doctor noted as Sesshomaru closed the distance to wrap her in his arms.

“Are you alright?” He rumbled as he held her tight.

“What happened?” She asked shakily as she pulled away to frantically search his face, hoping with all her heart that she was wrong.

“You died.” He said somberly as his eyes danced with emotion.

“Oh Kami,” She mumbled before dropping her head against his chest. It stayed like that a moment until nurse approached with the small bundle.

“You’re daughter.” She murmured even as she gazed at the Tai with wide eyes.

Kagome wasted no time in taking the bundle and pulling her close to look her over. Her hair was downy soft and as white as her mates; poking out the top of it were two triangular ears that reminded her so much of Inuyasha.

“She’s beautiful.” She murmured as she felt the shock at what had just happened recede to depths of her mind. She could worry about that later, but right now she had life to deal with.

“Yes she is.” Sesshomaru murmured as he leaned closer to inspect his pup; from his point of view, her features mirrored her mother in every way. “She looks like you.”

“Don’t be silly, she has your hair.” She murmured as she shifted over so he could sit down; her wounds and pains from the birthing being healed when he’d brought her back. “And I’m willing to bet anything she’s going to have your eyes.”

“They are a dominant trait in my family.” He conceded as he took a seat next to her.

Kagome looked up at him and smiled. “Do you want to hold her?”

For a single moment, panic overrode his features and then just like that it was gone. She smiled encouragingly as she held their daughter out; it was hard not to laugh as he awkwardly took the bundle, but she didn’t as she helped to settle her a bit more comfortably.

“See, I knew you could do it.” She murmured as she ran tender fingers over the pup’s forehead.

“Hn,” He grunted as he leaned down to scent the newest addition to their family.

“What do you want to name her?” She asked after a few moments.

“Rie.” He said after a moment.

“Rie.” Kagome murmured as she looked her daughter over a moment before smiling up at him. “I like that, it’s perfect… and so is she.”

“Of course she is, she is ours.” He said as he gazed into her eyes.

Even the happiest moments can be tinged with sorrow; one would have to be a fool to not appreciate those moments when they come, for they are far to fleeting…

“There, there it’ll be alright.” Kagome murmured soothingly as she rocked the crying girl in her arms back and forth.

“How will it be alright?” Rie sobbed as she clung to her mother. “I- I thought he liked me!”

“Oh honey.” She said as she hugged her closer and closed her eyes.

It had seemed like only yesterday that she and Sesshomaru were teaching Rie how to crawl, walk, talk, ride a bike, dance in the rain, sing, and teach her whatever else they could think of. As expected, Sesshomaru had excelled at being a father as Kagome had said he would, and there was no denying that Rie was ‘daddy’s little girl’.

But she was a teenager now, and at the age where she was convinced her father was trying to ruin her life; so in her times of strife, she would turn to her mother.

This was one of those times; she’d met a boy and had fallen in love, it was only too bad that the boy did not feel the same. Rie had come home in tears and had fallen straight into her mother’s arms to sob her heart out.

Sesshomaru remained rooted in his spot next to the doorframe; a look of pure fury on his face as he contemplated the ways to make the boy pay for hurting his baby.

“Rie listen to me.” Kagome said softly as she cupped her daughters face and lifted it so she had no choice but to look at her. And as always it never ceased to amaze her just how much her eyes resembled her fathers. “Sometimes life doesn’t always go the way you want it to, and I know it hurts now. But believe me when I say that it will get better.”

“But-“

“Hush I’m not done yet.” She chided as she wiped her tears away. “You’re still young and you have your whole life ahead of you; I just know that there’s someone out there who’s perfect for you, it’s just going to take some time and patience on your part to meet that special someone.”

“That’s easy for you to say, you have daddy.” She muttered then blinked when Kagome laughed softly.

“I didn’t always have your father you know.” She smiled down at her. “Nor was he my first love.”

“He wasn’t?” She asked in surprise as her eyes widened.

Kagome smiled again and shook her head. “No, but it’s because of that first love that I was able to meet your father. Things were horrible at first, and neither of us liked each other. But look at us now.”

“How did you meet daddy? And who was your first love?” She asked curiously.

Kagome rocked back a bit before cocking her head to the side to think a moment; while it was true that she and Sesshomaru had debated telling her about their pasts, they had never decided just when they would tell her.

“It’s not a very good story Rie.” She said doubtfully. “There’s a lot of pain and strife involved.”

“But I thought you were happy?” She frowned.

“Oh honey we are happy.” She said earnestly. “But not every moment is happy; it’s like I said, things don’t always go right. And Kami there was a lot that went wrong, but your father and I have learned to look beyond the pain so that we might find our moments of happiness.”

“Was it worth it?” Rie asked; and it was in that moment that Kagome realized her daughter had grown up to the point where moments of wisdom would emerge. This was one of those moments.

“More than you can possibly imagine.” She murmured as she turned her gaze up to her mate to find him watching her with a tender look in his eyes.

Eventually they told her everything; when she was old enough to hear such things without having to worry about nightmares and monsters under the bed.

And after that life was good; it was almost as if the Kami had decided to give them a break for all the trouble they’d gone through.

“I can’t believe our babies all grown up and getting married.” She murmured happily as they watched their daughter exchange her wedding vows.

“Indeed.” Sesshomaru murmured; this was a hard moment for him, as he felt like he was losing his little girl.

“She’s still ours Sesshomaru.” Kagome said sympathetically as she wrapped her arm around his waist. “Never forget that… she’ll always be ours.”

“Kagome?” Mrs. Higurashi asked in surprise as she opened the door.

“Mama I’m home.” Kagome beamed even as her tears broke free.   

“Oh thank Kami.” She murmured before pulling her daughter into her arms.

That night they regaled her family with the tale of their lives; it was by no means short, but that was okay, it made listening to it that much better.

“I want another one.” She said as she rocked her grandson while Rie took a nap.

“We’ve already discussed this Kagome.” Sesshomaru sighed as he set his paper down. “There’s too much risk, and I’ve already used Tenseiga to revive you. It won’t work a second time.”

“I know that, but seriously Sesshomaru, the medical field is at its best right now.” She said. “The chances are practically nonexistent.”

“No.”

“But what if it was a boy?” She asked softly as she turned pleading eyes on him. “You know you’ve always wanted a boy.”

He studied her for long moments; in most cases he could never say no to her, but this was the one thing he’d refused to budge on after Rie was born.

He’d never told her, but in the moment that she had died, he felt as if his world had just fallen apart. If not for Tenseiga’s rattling, he would’ve probably followed after her.

“Please Sesshomaru.” She begged again.

“Okay.” He said, though it was barely above a whisper.

Life was about taking chances; and since the Kami had been on their side for some time, they decided to take the risk. Sometimes it’s worth it…

“He’s so adorable.” Kagome cooed as she held her son for the first time. This time he had her hair and black puppy ears while he carried his father’s facial features; but unlike Rie, he had a blue crescent moon stamped on his forehead, signaling that he was Sesshomaru’s heir.

“Akira.” He said after a moment of studying the pup.

“I love it.” She said before passing him over and smiling as Sesshomaru took the pup with an ease he had not shown the first time around.

“You will grow to be wise and strong, my son.” Sesshomaru murmured as he gazed down at him. “Greatness is in your veins; you need only seek it out, and you will find it.

Life really wasn’t so bad if you really thought about it; if not for the moments filled with sorrow, you would never know to appreciate the moments that were filled with joy and contentment.

But with all things; even happiness must come to an end to yet again be replaced with sorrow, the never ending cycle. It’s absolutely vicious…

Sesshomaru had opened a business decades ago and with his knowledge and wisdom, he’d made it very successful. So successful in fact that several of the human business owners were beginning to feel threatened by the Tai; it wasn’t long before they were scheming and thinking up plans to put him out of business for good.

Neither of them saw what was coming; if they had then Sesshomaru would have found other means to care for his family, for he had no desire to put them in danger. Even then it probably wouldn’t have made a difference; for it wasn’t his family that was in danger, but himself.  

Kagome had called him while he was on his way home to say that she was taking Akira over to her mother’s so he could spend some time with his human relatives. Inuyasha was also in town and visiting the Higurashi family; when asked if she was going to stay there, she’d told him that it was so they could have a night to themselves.

He’d told her he loved her before hanging up; usually he never said such things, but there were times when he could be moved to unbend. No he wasn’t the stoic youkai that he’d once been, but that didn’t mean he wore his emotions on his sleeve either.

Like any other day he pulled into the driveway; and like any other day he climbed out of his car and headed for the door, his jacket and briefcase slung over his shoulder.

But unlike any other day, he was hit with something most surprising as he walked through the door, and in that moment he cursed himself for letting his guard down.

But it was too late for that; the trigger had been pulled, and now the result of that was burrowed deep in his stomach. Surprise overcame his features as he dropped to his knees, it was then he realized that this was no ordinary bullet, and that there was no way he was going to walk away from it…

Can anybody tell me why,

We’re lying here on the floor.

~*~ Begin Present Tense- memories are in Italics~*~

 

Kagome hummed along with the radio as she pulled onto their street and headed for their house; already her thoughts were turning to what she and Sesshomaru would do with the time to themselves.

Akira was already five years old and quite the handful; so when her mother had offered to babysit, she’d jumped at the chance to get some alone time with her mate.

She’d only just reached the driveway when she felt the stab of pain through her mating mark, it surprised her so badly that she hit the brakes and nearly cracked her head on the steering wheel.

And neither of us can barely breathe at all…

Wrong, wrong… something’s wrong. She thought as she glanced up to find the front door was open a crack; without stopping to think, she put the car in park and hopped out before darting over to the door. “Sesshomaru!”

Her stomach dropped to the ground when she spotted her mate face down on the floor.

“No Sesshomaru!” She exclaimed as she dropped to her knees by his side and rolled him over. “Sesshomaru?”

“Kagome,” He murmured as she took in the sight before her. He had a gaping hole where his stomach should have been, and for a moment she thought she was going to be sick.

“Oh Kami what happened?” She gasped as she yanked her sweater off to stem the flow of blood.

“Kagome listen to me.” He said, the urgency in his voice breaking her out of her panic. “I don’t have much time.”

“What? Sesshomaru what are you talking about?” She asked as she looked at him in confusion. “Oh- I have to call an ambulance.”

“Kagome,” He growled forcefully as he gripped her arms to keep her in place. “It’s too late.”

His heart clenched in pain as she flinched at his words; and he couldn’t help the somber look he gave her as she shook her head, almost as if she didn’t understand him.

“What do you mean it’s too late? It’s only a gut wound, Inuyasha-“

“Inuyasha wasn’t shot with a youkai killing bullet.”

“What! But how-“

“I’ve injected my own poison into my system.” He murmured as he reached up to brush her hair out of her face. “It’s numbing the effects for the moment.”

“Tenseiga-“

“No one possesses the ability to wield it.” He said gently. “You have to face this Kagome, it’s my time.”

“Don’t be stupid, how can you say that?” She glared down at him while swatting his hand away. “You didn’t give up when I died so how can you expect me to just give up on you now? And you promised!”

“This is different Kagome.” He said as he grasped her hands in his left hand before reaching up to grasp her chin and tilt her face down.

It was then that she really looked at him; and saw the sorrow in his eyes, eyes that had always expressed what he was feeling, even if the rest of him wouldn’t. “No…” She sobbed while collapsing against his chest.

“Kagome please listen to me.” He urged as he ran slightly shaking fingers through her beautiful blue-black locks. “You must go on.”

As we say our last goodbye

And this is the moment that changes our whole lives…

“I can’t-“

“Listen to me.” He interrupted. “Akira can’t go on through life without both of his parents; he needs you, now more than ever.”

“But the mark-“

“I will give you what remains of my youki.” He murmured. “It will sustain you for many years to come.”

“You expect me to go on living without you?” She asked in disbelief as her head snapped up. “Sesshomaru don’t you understand? You are my life.”

 He sighed as he gazed into her brilliant blue eyes; committing every minute detail of them to memory so that even in death, he would remember. There was so little time left; how could he ever hope to explain to her that just as he was her life, she was his?

He’d never thought it would come to this even though he’d considered the possibility of one of them dying before they were ready for it. But even then, a part of him always believed that they were above such trivial things; after all they’d survived all that life had to throw at them up until this point.

I’m staring deep into your eyes

They’re telling me the time has come

She let out a shaky breath as she pressed her cheek against his palm; his tempurature had always been warm, but at the moment his hand was practically burning. “I don’t know how I’m going to get through this without you by my side.”

And I know you’re ready to rise and sail home

“You are the Shikon Miko and Lady of the West.” He said. “You have all the strength and determination you’ll ever need.”

She blinked her eyes in an attempt to get the building tears to go away; but blinking only made it worse, and before she knew it, her head was falling to rest above his heart.

“Kami do I love the sound of that.” She mumbled as she snuggled closer to him.

“The sound of what?” He murmured while lazily running his fingers through her hair.

“The sound of your heart,” She smiled without opening her eyes. “It’s the most beautiful music I think I’ve ever heard.”

“Kagome,” He whispered as she struggled to regain control of herself. “Promise me.”

She bit her lip and took a deep breath. Oh Kami why? She thought as she slowly raised her head to look at him.

“Promise me you will go on, for Akira, for Rie.”

“Okay.” She whispered as she reached up to run the back of her fingers along his striped cheek.

“Thank you.” He sighed before pulling her close to share one last kiss with her.

He wasn’t quite sure how it had gotten to this point; but as their lips met for the first time, he was glad that it had. It no longer mattered if he was following in his father’s footsteps, didn’t care what other youkai thought.

Somehow this slip of a Miko had wormed her way into his frozen heart, and had succeeded in melting until it was overcome with such burning need that it left him breathless.

As we say our last goodnight

I thank you for every second of your life

Once they separated, she stayed close to him, not wanting to let a single second of whatever time they had left slip through her fingers.

“I’ve never regretted falling in love with you.” He murmured as he wiped another tear from her cheek. “In fact, I thank you for teaching me the things you have; it’s because of you that I was able to do so many things, see so many magical places. I will forever be eternally grateful.”

She smiled shakily. “That’s what I do.”

He smirked faintly before sobering again as he cupped her face in both of his hands. “And most of all, I thank you for our children. I thank you for giving me the opportunity to be the kind of father I wished I had while growing up.”

“Sessh…” She sobbed softly as she gripped his hands only to frown as he tensed. “Sessh?”

And I’m falling, watching as your hurting

I’m down here, I’m on my knees

How can I survive?

“It’s almost time,” He whispered as the spasm passed, leaving him feeling more drained then he ever had felt in his life.

“Oh please no.” She begged softly as she moved to grip his shirt.

“Kagome, it’s alright.” He murmured. “Everything will be alright. I know you’ll be okay, that means its okay for me to go.”

“No…” She sobbed. “Please no.”

“Kagome look at me.” He said with more force, causing her head to snap up. His gaze softened. “Do not be foolish onna; we belong together, and not even death can separate us.”

And tell me you’ll be waiting on the other side.

“I love you.” He murmured.

“I love you to.” She whispered before closing the distance to lock her lips with his one last time.

It was in that moment that she felt the swell of his youki even as the breath left his lungs; all at once she was sucking that breath and his youkai in, and once it was done she was struck dumb.

It shouldn’t have been possible for his youki to exist within her since she was a Miko, but they’d been mated for so long that her powers had learned to welcome it with open arms.

She blinked herself out of her shock and looked down to find the eyes that had once been so full of love every time he gazed at her were now empty and lifeless.

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” She wailed as she gripped onto his shirt while pressing her ear against his chest; hoping with all her might that she would hear his music one last time…

~*~

And I still believe in the good

And I still believe in the light

And I wanna to feel the sun

I wanna free you tonight

~*~

The children had been heartbroken; Akira was inconsolable for days while Rie had her husband to turn to. Kagome pushed aside her own heartache in order to help her children come to terms with their loss.

That didn’t mean she didn’t have days where she wanted nothing more than to give up; but each time that happened, she would feel his youki pulse. It was almost as if the part of him that he’d given her was there to simply remind her that she had made a promise and her time on earth was not yet done.

It also helped to have Inuyasha and even Shippo around to help pull her out of her slumps. And with their help, they kept Sesshomaru’s business running.

A full investigation had gone on after Sesshomaru’s death; it took months before anything turned up, but once they’d found the assassin, it was a cake walk to find the persons behind it.

Kagome sat in the front row of the courtroom with Inuyasha and the rest of her family by her side as the judge passed sentence. It was a day of closure for her, in that she was finally able to put the matter to rest.

...

Several years later…

“Well it looks like he’s all grown up now huh?” Inuyasha asked as he joined Kagome under the Goshinboku.

“Indeed.” She smiled faintly as she watched her now grown son twirl his new bride around before pulling her into his arms.

“He’d be proud of you, ya know.” He said after a moment. “All of you.”

“I know.” She murmured as she felt the familiar pulse deep within her soul.

“How are you doing with all of that anyway?”

She was silent a moment as she closed her eyes while the gentle spring breeze washed over her. “It still hurts… but I made a promise.”

Inuyasha studied her for several moments before looking away. “How long?”

“A few more years,” She said softly. “It’s getting weaker, signaling my time is almost up.”

“What about the kids?”

“They know.” She said. “It was impossible to keep it from them all things considered; they know what it means to be mated and marked.”

“Were they okay with it?”

“Rie understood, but Akira’s still having some trouble with it.” She sighed as she leaned back against the sun warmed bark of the ancient tree. “I told him that was alright and that one day he would understand. I think it made it easier on him when I promised to be there when his first child is born.”

“I see.”

They sat in contented silence for awhile before she turned to study him.

“What?” He asked warily.

“What about you Inuyasha?” She asked softly. “When will you be able to move on?”

His ears drooped as he lowered his gaze. “I’m not made for loving someone Kagome. You should know that by now.”

“Silly hanyou,” She chuckled as she took his hand and squeezed it. “Everyone was made for loving someone; Kami your brother was the perfect example of that. If he could do it, then so could you.”

“Keh, it was easy for him because it was you he hooked up with.” He mumbled and she couldn’t help but smile.

“That’s not the case and you know it.” She chided. “After all, it wasn’t me who first cracked the icy exterior of his heart.”

“Well if it wasn’t you, then who was it?” He asked curiously.

“First it was Rin.” She said as she turned her gaze to a point over his shoulder, and when he followed it, he found she was looking at the well house. “She taught him that protecting someone wasn’t necessarily a weakness. And then there was Kagura.”

“What did she have to do with it?” He frowned.

“She taught him that he was capable of holding more adult feelings.” She murmured. “Granted they never got together; but he told me once that she’d been a curiosity, one that if given the time, he may have tried to solve.”

“Why do you think everything turned out the way it did?”

“Because that’s the way it was supposed to.”

“But most of it sucked if you think about it.”

“I won’t argue with you on that.” She murmured. “But if it wasn’t for the times of sorrow, we never would have learned to appreciate the times of joy.”

“So you were happy?”

“Yes I was.”

“Huh.” He mused as he leaned against the tree that had been his resting place for fifty years oh so long ago. “I wonder what that’s like.”

“You should try it sometime.” She said as she rested her head next to his and closed her eyes. “You might like it.”

...

Akira’s first born was a boy and he named him Sesshomaru in his father’s honor. Kagome had been present for his birth and she couldn’t help but watch with a melancholy smile as she watched his wife pass him to her son, much in the same way she’d passed Rie to Sesshomaru when she was born.

“I have something for you.” She said after awhile. “I know you won’t be able to use it in the way intended… but I think your father would have wanted you to have it.”

“What is it?” He asked curiously as he passed his son back to his wife before approaching her.

“This.” She said as she held up the long rectangular box.

He blinked in surprise before slowly lifting the lid to find Tenseiga nestled within. “But-“

“He was buried with Bakusaiga.” She murmured as she watched him rest a hand on it. “It only made sense since it was made from his own power and was still very dangerous.”

“You really think he would want me to have it?” He asked as he lifted his gaze to meet hers.

“Of course, you are his son.” She smiled. “And now you are Lord of the Western Lands.”

“Um mom, I hate to burst your bubble… but the Western Lands aren’t really there anymore.” He said apologetically.

“I know this son; after all, I was there when they fell.” She said dryly. “But even so, you are your father’s son. You may not have any lands to lord over but it’s the idea that matters.”

“I understand.” He said as he closed the lid then gently lifted it out of her hands. “Thank you mama.”

“You’re welcome son.” She smiled softly as she ran her fingers along his cheek before dropping her hand to her side.

“You… you aren’t going now are you?” He asked worriedly.

“Of course not,” She exclaimed then chuckled. “I still have yet to hold my grandson after all.”

...

She stayed with them for four more years; simply to ensure they were going to be alright once she was gone. And in that time she’d gotten to witness events as Inuyasha finally learned to let go of the past and learned that he was capable of loving and being loved in return.

“I’m happy for you brother.” She smiled as she ruffled his hair a bit.

“Keh, you would be ya wench.” He groused even as his cheeks heated in a blush.

“Am I not supposed to?” She arched an eyebrow.

“Stop looking at me like that, Kami you look like Sesshomaru.”

“Well I was his mate for over five hundred years it only makes sense that I would pick up some of his quirks.” She mused as she turned her gaze to the gardens.

At the moment they were hanging out in her backyard; the sun had set some time ago, allowing the crescent moon to shine down on them as the stars winked in the sky.

“Times almost up… isn’t it?” He asked as he watched her.

“It is.” She said calmly.

“Is that why you wanted me here?” He frowned.

“You know I would never put you through something like that.” She chided.

“So what’s up then?”

“I just wanted to spend some time with you is all. You’re my oldest and dearest friend Inuyasha.” She said softly as she turned to look at him. “And I think out of everyone; my children and family included, you are going to miss me most of all.”

He stiffened at that then sighed as he went slack. “After you… well it’s just me and Shippo. Everyone else is gone Kagome, I don’t know what I’m going to do without you.”

“You’ll go on as you always have, and now that you’ve finally let go of old hurts, you won’t have to go it alone.” She said as she rested a hand on his shoulder. “Remember what I said Inuyasha, you can’t appreciate the joy without first enduring the sorrow.”

“If you say so,” He sighed; knowing it was pointless to argue with her. Even after five hundred years, she’d still beat the mule when it came to stubborn.

It was in the early hours of the morning that she walked him out and bade him goodbye for the last time. But even as she watched him walk down the drive, she knew he wouldn’t go far.

“Goodbye.” She whispered softly.

Once the door was shut; she looked around the house one last time, smiling faintly as each object brought a fond memory to the surface of her mind. All the matters had already been taken care of; her family would be well provided for and would want for nothing for a very long time to come.

When she felt the pulse of his youki, she knew it was time. With that she headed into the gardens, following the soft pull deep within her soul.

And when she saw him all she could do was smile. Granted he was transparent and nothing more than a manifestation of his soul, she would know him anywhere.

I’m staring deep into your eyes

They’re telling me the time has come

 “What are you?” He murmured; bringing their first encounter to the forefront of her mind.

“The girl who’s going to turn your world upside down,” She smiled as she took a step forward.

“I thought you already had?” He arched and eyebrow and smirked.

“Yes well we both know there are more worlds than just this one.” She said lightly as she took another step forward. “And I intend to turn them all upside down for you.”

“You would.” He sighed then held a hand out. “Are you ready to go home mate?”

“Only so long as you’re by my side, I’ll go anywhere you please.” She whispered as she lifted her own hand.

“Then it shall be so… until the end of time.”

“Sounds good to me.”

And I know you’re ready to rise and sail home

And with that, she placed her hand in his and gasped as he pulled her soul from her body. Neither looked back as her physical body slid to the ground; after all the beings of this world were no longer their concern.

“I missed you.” She said softly as she melted into his embrace.

“And I you.” He rumbled softly as he held her close, reveling in the feeling of holding her once more as her scent filled his head.

She pulled back only far enough to tilt her head, welcoming him as he closed the gap between them until their lips locked together once more.

It felt like their first and last kiss, along with every other kiss they’d ever shared. And nothing else had ever felt more perfect or right.

“Come.” He said once they’d broken apart. “Heaven awaits us.”

“Then let’s not keep it waiting.” She grinned as she took his hand and let him lead her further into the now mist covered garden.

As we say our last goodbye

Neither of them was aware of the sorrow filled golden eyes that watched from the shadows as they faded into the mists. And once they had gone; Inuyasha stepped into the predawn light to take in the fallen form of his once love, and best friend.

“Goodbye.”

~Fin~

 

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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