Seven of Seven by DOOMsquee

Sloth.

DOOM - This tardiness is not allowed! ::slaps hand:: I had seriously planned writing this long time ago when the challenge first came out but I got to occupied in school, shame on me.

Disclaimer - Sadly I don’t own anything relating to Inuyasha.

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Sloth.

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Oh mother of…”What are you doing Sesshoumaru?!” I couldn’t believe my eye sight, it just wasn’t normal. There in the middle of the clearing was Sesshoumaru, dare I say it, break dancing? The cold lord himself was spinning circles on his palm and there he goes flipping in the air.

I think I just saw some muscle, my brain wants to shut down right now, I can feel it. The wheels in there are turning slower and slower, I’m willing myself to stay up right. Whatever I thought was right was absolutely and totally wrong. My poor teenage brain can’t take this.

“What does it look like this Sesshoumaru is doing?”

I blinked and looked at the change of scenery, this has to be a dream. I pinched my arm hard, no owie, this sure is a dream. Scratch that, this is a nightmare. The swooshing of tropical rainforest plants beside me alerted me to movement, I stepped back scared to find out what my dysfunctional brain conjured up this time.

Oh my, OH MY GOD!

This is just plain out wrong, what has happened to you brain?! I remember the good ol’ times we had dreams about Sesshoumaru’s muscled body creeping up on us and making sweet passionate sex to us everywhere, even in a tree, but this?

I could feel my mouth hanging wide open, my eyes probably looking wide like Jakens eyes, ew. What’s wrong with Jaken anyways, always screaming at me to keep away from his Sesshoumaru. If Sesshoumaru’s anyone’s claim, he is mine. That’s right, I’ll get it tattooed on his chest in big, black, bold letters saying ‘Property of Kagome Higerashi. Other bitches back off!’

Only in my dreams…

Speaking of dreams, I could feel my body slowly coming from shock from all of this, this monstrosity. It’s just not right.

There halfway coming out of the bushes is Sesshoumaru and all his glory in a sloth, you got that, a sloth costume. Wait…I don’t even think that is a costume.

Oh gross, gross, gross, gross!

Brain, you need help. You need some serious help, how can you conjure up this?! You just mainly ruined Sesshoumaru’s nice body and ass! Now all there is, is Sesshoumaru’s head and his silver hair, the rest is just…ew.

Ooh, the tounge, oh he has a sloth tounge! Gross!

I’m closing my eyes and clicking my feet together. “There’s no place like home, there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home.” Seriously? Wizard of Oz? Like that’s going to help my situation, I don’t even have the ruby red sparkly shoes. The ones that sparkle like Edward, which comes up to be Edward equaling gayness. Really, what vampire sparkles?

None, that’s right none. I bet if Sesshoumaru was a vampire he’d still be as equally sexy and not sparkle!

That’s a dream I would love to have, but no I get stuck with the sloth/Sesshoumaru…thing.

I opened my eyes and found myself in a comfortable bed with black and crimson sheets, oh thank goodness, I’m actually home. Thank you Wizard of Oz! I snuggled deeper into the blankets and sighed, I turned around to face the side I knew Sesshoumaru would be and saw his silver hair.

I closed my eyes and cuddled up into his back, I smiled when I felt him move around to put his arm over me but I froze. His arm is NOT hairy, oh no, no, no, no, no.

My eyes shot wide open and I threw the covers back and screamed at the top of my lungs. You can’t be serious!

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DOOM - FAIL. I total fail, I couldn’t go any further then that.

Please send me hate mail for my obvious fail, thank you(:

 

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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