The gift of Christmas by criticat

Chapter 1

I apologize for posting this much later than I wanted to! Enjoy!

Standard disclaimer applies. 

“What about this one?” he asked and pointed out yet another ring. This one was princess cut, with a platinum band. Kagome smiled at him and went to put it on, but he stopped her.

“Allow me, if you don’t mind,” he said, in an uncharacteristically gentlemanly tone. He picked the ring up and slipped it on to her slender finger. “I want to make sure to do it properly when the big day comes, you see,” he said nervously.

Kagome smiled. “It’s lovely,” she nodded, turning her hand so that the diamond caught the light. “I think this is the one you know.”

“Really?” Kouga asked, looking worried. “I don’t know. I see Ayame liking the round one more. Can you try it on again?”

“Sure.”

Kagome patiently slipped the ring off and put the other one on again, holding her hand out for Kouga to see. He just stared at it intently.

Kagome sighed. She really wished he asked someone else to help him choose. Or at least allowed one of the jewelry experts to recommend something. But Kouga sent them all running for the hills with his scowls and clipped replies, saying that he had already done his research and just wanted to see the rings in action, so to speak.

Kagome was just glad that she did her nails two days ago. At least she looked somewhat presentable in this horribly, awfully, eye-wateringly expensive shop.

As she looked down at his head poised over the ring, Kagome allowed herself to drift off into fantasy that it was Sesshomaru who’s just slipped the ring on her finger. Perhaps in some simple, yet romantic setting. He didn’t seem like a ‘dinner proposal’ type. She would have come home to have him waiting on her doorstep, a little disheveled, just after a flight. The ring would be in his pocket. He would look at her and say-

“This is tricky.”

“Huh?” Kagome’s eyes focused on the male in front of her.

“This ring stuff is much harder than I thought,” he grouched. “I thought that once I saw them on, I would know exactly which one she would like but.. I’m not sure.”

Kagome took a deep breath. She wanted to leave. Her feet were killing her and she would rather just go home. Sango invited her over for a Christmas party but Kagome didn’t really feel like going.

“What do you think?” Kouga asked, giving up trying to figure out Ayame’s preference himself.

“Personally? I like the round cut better. But Ayame might find it a bit boring. Definitely the marquise  cut. It’s gorgeous!” Kagome managed a bright smile.  Kouga whooped and called the nervous assistants over.

Ten minutes later, he was happily on his way. Kagome watched him go, thinking of Ayame opening the deep-blue velvet box on Christmas morning. She felt happy for them, she really did. But then again, it just made her feel worse about having daydreams of Sesshomaru proposing.

Because that was never going to happen.

Kagome shouldered her bag and started walking down the street. The shops were full of people doing last minute shopping, all rushing round with parcels and bags on every arm. There was an atmosphere of excitement, a good-humored panic. People were smiling and gushing over the brilliant window displays, cheerful tunes were being played, and there were delicious scents in the air.

Kagome adored Christmas. Everything about it was great: seeing her family, cooking her favorite foods, going to Christmas markets, wrapping up gifts and decorating the house, curling up on the sofa with her boyfriend and having him all to herself for a little while. She loved the general sense that normal life was suspended and something amazingly wonderful could happen at any minute.    

Well, this year wouldn’t be quite like that. Having followed her boyfriend of six years to London when his business expanded, she spent several weeks in England.  She enjoyed the country, the sights and the culture. Sesshomaru’s company? Not so much. To be able to enjoy something one would actually have to experience it. And he wasn’t really round. So, 10 days before Christmas, she packed up her bags and went back to Tokyo. Back to her apartment. And seeing as Sesshomaru didn’t call her once, he was either royally pissed off or didn’t care.

She paused for a minute to look at the window displays. It showed an enchanted forest with gorgeous, mismatched things resting here and there: shoes and bags, scarves and gloves, chocolates and silver bells. In the middle, stood a man and a woman. They were standing against a lovely painted backdrop of green spruce trees and shimmering, suspended snowflakes.

Kagome wondered what Sesshomaru was doing now. Although rationally, she knew that it was her decision to leave, her who didn’t even have the grace to say goodbye, she still felt like it was him that walked away from their relationship. It wasn’t much of relationship for the last several months but she clung to whatever was left of it, hoping and waiting. She felt her eyes welling up and had to blink quickly to stop herself crying.

She sniffed. To distract herself, Kagome thought of her family. She decided not to tell them she was back in town. Her mother – although she would never openly admit it – was probably hoping for a different kind of announcement than the one Kagome would have to make. So, Kagome chose to be a coward and not to tell her family just yet. She did confess to Sango, if only to have someone say that she was right. Sango did so with vigor. She didn’t dislike Sesshomaru, but she wasn’t very fond of him either.

Still, Kagome wished that Sesshomaru would be here with her now. The old Sesshomaru. The one that wanted her round. Not the one that was so obsessed with work that he barely remembered to show up to their dinner dates and cancelled plans constantly.

On a whim, she closed her eyes briefly, and murmured under her breath, “I wish I could have what we had back.”

She felt her phone ring in her jacket pocket and opened her eyes. Was it? Could it be?

It was Sango.

“Kagome! Where are you? You promised to come, remember? And don’t you tell me you don’t feel like it!” Sango shouted over the noise of the party, “Because staying in and wallowing in your misery isn’t good for you, you hear me?”

“Fine, fine! I will be there in an hour,” Kagome relented.

An hour and a half later Kagome made it to Sango and Miroku’s apartment. Pulling at her dress Kagome glanced around the room. White fairy lights dangled from the ceiling, all the free surfaces were decorated with tinsel and ornaments, and waiters were wearing Santa uniforms. It looked a bit like Santa’s grotto gone mad. The place was packed, but she eventually found her friend standing in the kitchen.

“I’m guessing it wasn’t you who organized all this,” Kagome giggled, giving Sango a hug and greeting the others.

“Well clearly Sango couldn’t pull something this amazing off,” Jakotsu sighed playfully, “She was hopeless! I had to step in.”

“Here, take this and then have a bit of this,” Miroku handed her two glasses, “Let’s drink and make merry!” he winked.

Kagome sniffed the drink. “What’s in it?”

“It’s called a Jolly Christmas,” Sango said, pouring herself a glass of the delicious-looking creamy drink from the pitcher on the table, “I’ve no idea what’s in it but it’s good.”

Kagome sipped some of the cocktail. “Mmm, good stuff.”

“Told you. So, are you looking forward to spending Christmas with your family tomorrow?”

Kagome nodded. No need to let Sango know that all she really had planned for Christmas is wine and cheesy romantic comedies.

This made her think of Sesshomaru. He used to say that only fools appreciated romantic comedies. It used to irritate the crap out of her when he made a face each time she chose one. She tried to snap out of it and pay attention to whatever Sango was saying.

“So, did I tell you that Miroku is going to be working on a big fraud case? It’s actually been on the news and seems pretty exciting because-“ she stopped and frowned. “Why do you look sad?”

“Oh, it’s just- Sesshomaru..”

“Oh, for the love of-” seeing Kagome’s face crumpling up Sango stopped. Taking a deep breath, she willed herself to calm down.

“Kagome, you have to stop torturing yourself over Sesshomaru. It’s done. He hasn’t called once since you left. You have to let it go.”

“I know. I just can’t help thinking, if I wasn’t so impulsive.. If I’d done things differently, I could be in London with Sesshomaru now.”

“Maybe. But think about it this way. You were the one to move to please his royal highness. You were the one making all the sacrifices. You were the one who was willing to do everything to make the relationship work. Besides, you love your job and are doing great at work. Where does London fit in with your plans?” Sango reached for her friend, giving her a hug.

“I would have worked something out,” Kagome mumbled into Sango’s shoulder.

“Hey, what’s with the face?” Inuyasha pulled the two apart, giving Kagome a tight squeeze. “Just get yourself another glass of whatever and get shitfaced drunk. Forget about that asshole!”

Waving him away, Kagome giggled despite herself, taking a sip of her second drink, something fruity and sour this time. This was followed by champagne, which Kagome knew wasn’t the best idea on top of the cocktails. That, followed by a quick succession of whatever else Jakotsu gave her, was how Kagome found herself lying outside of her apartment building in the snow. Still blissfully drunk, she could pretend that it was not Sesshomaru standing over her, looking at her with a frown, as if deciding whether he should help her or just walk away.

“Hi,” she muttered.

“Woman, what do you think you are doing? It is freezing out. You will catch your death,” he said, pulling her up and steadying her against his chest. Kagome shivered. This made Sesshomaru’s frown deepen.

“Fancy meeting you here,” she slurred, looking away from him in embarrassment.

Sesshomaru put his head on one side, assessing her.

“Let’s get you inside. Then we will talk,” he said with an air of finality.

He took the keys out of her jacket pocket and threw the protesting girl over his shoulder. Opening the door, he made his way to the elevator, ignoring Kagome’s squeaks of outrage. As the doors shut, he set her down beside himself, smirking as she adjusted her dress to cover her legs properly.

“I don’t want to talk to you,” Kagome blew her hair out of her face, feeling a little more sober after being thrown around like a rag doll. “You left me.”

“I was under the impression that it was your decision to fly back to Tokyo,” he said in clipped tones, not looking down at her as he walked out of the elevator.

“You know what I mean,” Kagome huffed as she followed.

And then something strange happened. Kagome felt Sesshomaru falter in his step. She looked up to see him gaze at her intently, his face much closer to hers than she realized. Kagome noticed that he looked tired, there was a tightness around his eyes that gave it away. His clothes, usually worn with such precision, were obviously thrown on without much thought as to how he would look. She detected a flicker of uncertainty in his eyes that instead of making him look lost made Sesshomaru look even more attractive.

“Would you like to come in?” she murmured quietly, still a little lost in him.

“I should be asking you that, seeing as I’m the one with the keys,” he replied with a good-natured chuckle.

Her stomach chose that moment to make it known that she was, in fact, starving.

“Have you got any food in there, or is there still nothing except coffee in your apartment?” Sesshomaru asked.

She shook her head. She was a terrible cook, so she just generally ate out.

“I will be back. Go take a shower,” he commanded, letting her into the apartment and shutting the door with a soft click.

Kagome ran to the mirror and chanced a look at herself.

“Great, just great,” she moaned. Not only she felt horrible and achy, but she looked plain awful. Her make-up was all smudged, and not in a sexy way. Her hair was a bird’s nest with a cocktail umbrella stuck in it and her dress was twisted round. Groaning in annoyance, Kagome half stumbled half ran to the bathroom. She didn’t know how long Sesshomaru would be, but she hoped to make herself somewhat presentable by the time he returned.

Sesshomaru came back an hour later with a bucket of TFC.

“Tokyo Friend Chicken? Really? Oh, Sesshomaru, I didn’t think you to be the type to eat this stuff,” she smiled, grabbing a piece of chicken and biting into it with vigor. “I hope no one saw the great Sesshomaru Taisho walk into a fast food restaurant. Oh, the horror!” she fake gasped.

“Just be quiet and eat,” he huffed.

She obliged without complaint.

Sesshomaru cleared his throat, looking nervous. “I expect you are wondering about me being here.”

Kagome swallowed her food and looked at him. Sesshomaru almost always exuded a degree of confidence that most found hard to achieve. Everything about him was put together, from the way he spoke to the way he wore his clothes. But sitting here, looking half-dead from exhaustion, not being able to put his thoughts into words.. She never heard him sound so shaken and she didn’t like it.

“ I came to Tokyo… I hoped…”

Suddenly, he was not talking anymore. He was being kissed. Kagome felt herself being gathered into his arms. His lips were cold, but it was the warmest, the most passionate kiss. She could feel his heart beating, and then his hands were in her hair as she melted into him. Then he released her and looked at her with a look of happiness.

“I’m sorry, too.” She smiled. “I shouldn’t have just left without saying anything.”

“It was me that shouldn’t have left you almost entirely alone in London. I apologize.”

“So, what now?” Kagome shifted, careful not to touch his expensive coat with her oily fingers.

“I think the time has come for us to talk about where this relationship is going,” he suggested.

“Oh?” she wiped her fingers on a napkin and turned around to face him better.

“I know that all I did in London was work. I wanted to get as much as I could done before Christmas because…” he faltered, “I wanted this Christmas to be a start of something special.”

Kagome’s eyes widened as he moved to get something out of his pocket. A deep-blue velvet box.

“I hoped to do this a little differently. I booked the private dining room at the Sky Garden in London. But, perhaps, the place is of no importance.”

His hand cupped her face and he looked at her with such intensity that her heart beat a wild staccato against her ribcage.

 “Kagome,” he said, taking her hand. Kagome looked at him, dazed. She literally felt speechless.

“You know I love you,” he swallowed, and her heart skipped a beat. Sesshomaru never said that before. “I decided to stay in Tokyo, to be with you.”

Her cheeks were a subtle pink as he reached gently for the box, opening it to reveal the ring she helped Kouga choose. A beautiful round cut solitaire diamond on a platinum band.

“I wanted to make sure you liked the ring,” he explained. “It seems that lately I cannot get most things right, so I wanted to be certain that it you would like it.”

And she did. The rind was absolutely breathtaking, the diamond glittering in the light.

“Will you marry me?” he asked in a low voice.

“Yes,” she stammered.

Sesshomaru smiled triumphantly and leaned forward to kiss her. She kissed him back, not quite believing what’s just happened. She gripped his shoulder with her right hand as he slid the ring on to her ring finger, where it sparkled in the faint light. Kagome felt euphoric, a little drunk, confused, terrified, and engaged.

Perhaps being proposed over a bucket of friend chicken was not most girls’ idea of ‘romantic’ but… To Kagome it was absolute bliss.

She was so happy that she couldn’t stop smiling. Sesshomaru moved them to the sofa. They curled up together: her snuggled into the crook of his arm and chest, his chin on top of her head, her legs flung over his. They’ve spent most of the time talking: about the last six years, about how their feelings changed, about what they wanted from their future. He told her he was sorry for making her wait for him, she silenced him with kisses. Kagome ran her fingertip over his gorgeous mouth as he smiled at her. Suddenly a thought occurred to her.

“What are you worrying about now?” he asked.

She laughed. “Is it that obvious? Well.. just about this really.”

“What about it?”

“What if we wake up one day, and we are back where we started? I mean, as if we don’t really know what the other wants anymore?”

He sighed and gave her a tight squeeze.

“I know what you mean,” he murmured into her hair. “It can be frightening. There are no guarantees. But isn’t that the same for all relationships? No one ever knows what is going to happen. All I can say is, I intend not to let you get away from me again.” He kissed her, and then held her at arm’s length to look into her eyes.

“Oh trust me, there will be no getting rid of me now,” she grinned playfully.

“Good.  Now sleep,” he said quietly, pressing her against his chest.