maru'sningenluvr19 (Chapter 1) - Fri 22 May 2020

i'm reading this story for the 2nd time and it was worth it. the last time was in 2015 and its still a good read. the chapters were long and i liked how everyone had a great ending. kikyou and inuyasha got a 'happy ever after' and it was fun seeing that they did. i am a great fan of sesshoumaru and kagome fan fiction. your writing keeps me interested in reading more. you have a way with the written word that makes one seem apart of the story. keep it up and i will be sure to read more of your stories. keep up the great writing. c'ya'


Raynell (Chapter 17) - Sat 10 Oct 2015

I rather enjoyed the story; you have an interesting premise and the developments occurred timely for the most part. There were a few grammatical mistakes and wrong word use but nothing so major as to induce a headache. No, the headache-inducer is a diferent matter altogether.

As you are an aspiring novelist, I feel compelled to point out to you: please copy edit and format your story to break the great big blocks of text you have. Multiple dialogues should not coexist in one paragraph; a new speaker always gets a new paragraph. Having Kagome and Sesshomaru's dialogue follow one another within the same paragraph is distracting -- it spoils the enjoyment of the reader and makes it hard for the reader to follow what is going on. A good guide to formatting is a newspaper article. Read articles from NYT, Reuters, AP or BBC News and take note of how dialogue and information are disseminated and organized. Utilizing this basic format will help your stories and ideas flow better, and also help immerse your readers into the world you are creating for them.

Don't depend on blogs or Buzzfeed, as their grammar and formatting are not what novelists and professional writers employ.

I hope you don't mind me pointing this out -- it is just that many do not say anything in reviews to help the author improve for fear of being accused of trolling or picking on said author. I only decided to say this because although your walls of text were painful to get through, I managed to finish your story because you have managed to interest me in your tale and to keep that interest going tlll the end. So don't stop writing; keep developing your potential.

Just don't forget to format more. Cheers. :)


candace peaches (Chapter 17) - Fri 25 Sep 2015

loved it. this was very good story. once again i loved how sesshoumaru was depicted in this fanfic. keep writing and i'll keep reading. c'ya'


xxLadyBluejayxx (Chapter 17) - Tue 17 Dec 2013

This was a lovely story. Truly you have a talent.  I feel Kagome was very well portrayed.  Thank you for this wonderful story.  I look forward to someday purchase a book by Lynn LeHew!!


waterwomen1414 (Chapter 17) - Wed 17 Oct 2012

wonderful absolutly wonderful and just so you know it is well past midnight because i wouldnt put the story down


hana sora (Chapter 17) - Fri 31 Aug 2012

i love this story, keep going write more sessho/kagome story :D

 


BaxterMisty (Chapter 17) - Sun 22 Jul 2012

Beautiful story!


LoveAndFaith (Chapter 17) - Thu 12 Jul 2012

Great story and I enjoyed it.


KaminokoDaughters (Chapter 1) - Thu 12 Jul 2012

It's very captivating so far. The demon capturers are very realistic and vile. It's great!  Their way of discerning her innocence or lack thereof was very…traumatizing, to be sure- at least for Kagome.  I enjoy your story so far. It’s definitely caught my attention.  I’m hooked already. 

--KD

Oh, I just wanted to let you know that her name is Kaede not Kaeda.


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