I like your storyline but it was a little hard to read because of the lack of spacing in between paragraphs. Some spelling and grammar errors, but other than that, you are off to a good start.

Please update soon. As I stated before on your other story 'Crescent', I would like to see how you progress. I'm sure you will do well.

*smiles & hugs* :)

For the love of god, please correct that horrid grammar. Not one to be talking, but can you do a grammar check on word? Other than that and the spelling, I like it


~Zen

Like the story but it's a little hard on the eyes. I'm not young anymore do us old people a favor and space btwn paragraphs.

Hehehe, I like it! You might want to add some more spaces in between things, because the paragraphs run together a bit on the page, but your grammar and spelling are good .The idea is really cute, too. :) I hope to see more soon!